I Have Aphasia. Now What?

The best way I can explain aphasia is through a metaphor: files.

Think of the brain as a system of files. Normally, when you want to say something, you can find the right file, open it, and use the information inside. You hear something, your brain processes it, finds the correct file, and sends a response back out.

After a stroke, aphasia changes this process.

Some files are missing. Other files still exist, but you cannot find the path to open them. You know the information is there, but it will not come out when you need it.

For example, during a conversation, someone may say something to you. Your brain tries to process it, find the right words, arrange them, and send them back. But sometimes the file does not open. Other times, the wrong file opens, and you say something you did not mean. Occasionally, you hear yourself say it and realize it is wrong, but it is already out.

This can be frustrating. You may know the answer, but the words will not come. The connection between your brain and your mouth does not work the way you want it to.

Typing can be especially difficult for me. Listening can also be hard. Sometimes I understand what is being said, and sometimes I do not. Even when everything works perfectly, language has many steps. With aphasia, there are even more.

One thing that has helped me is practicing sentences slowly. I break words into small chunks—two or three words at a time—and write them down by hand. When people talk quickly, the information can pass me by but writing forces me to slow down and understand what the words mean.

Writing and speaking help rebuild those files. With enough practice, some files become easier to find. When that happens, I can pull them up more naturally—and use them again.